When you feel like it's time for something, to happen. Something big. Like the coming of age. Or a big concert, maybe that you are starring in. Something that you've been leading up to. The tide washes out, just before.
And just before the big wave comes in to replace it, you can see nothing a while. It's as though, nothing, has been around me for days. Maybe a month. Come to think of my recent past, I've been very alone in the midst of it all.
I'm coming to see that there is a reason for it, although I don't fully know the total expression of it. I have my psychic abilites, so I have a wind of it. But, the tide has not yet shown back up, so I still wait. Nothing moves. It must be a big wave, I'm thinking. I'm thinking this, also, because my guides, sort of tell me. They tend to my sadness of being alone. They tell me, cherish these days, they won't last forever. And I do try. They are nice. I'm not working a whole lot yet, apart from my new 9-5 of writing constantly, meditating constantly. Operating in a new way, in all parts of my life. I guess I had to let go of some old habits to create new ones. It wasn't easy. I lost a lot of my will.
I think I'm gaining access to something new in it's absence. The will of the divine. It is much bolder than mine, much stronger. Also more loving. I find myself writing poetry. Drawing pictures only from prayers. Loving myself more through the words I speak to others. It is truly sweet. I wouldn't say I miss my old patterns, it's just, when you suddenly do a 180, things move swift. And in order for me to feel comfortable, I wish others to move along with me. However, they don't. Everyone has their tides at different moments of their lives. I'm sure everyone has them just as often just as big and wide. I only wonder, if when my tide finally rolls in, who else will be on it?
Or will I be the only sail in my sea?
Opening up to see the light.
Dear ones, this will have been my first blog post of many. I hope it suits you well to know that, at this time, I am in Kitsilano, Vancouver. I am beginning again. I will be sending out a newsletter often, so if you had signed up for Alana the tattoo artist, know now that it is remaining, but also alongside Alana the channel.
I will also say that, for some time, I have been procrastinating my blog till now! So come one come all and feel what I have been privileged to have learned. It is continual as well, so check in often for new content.
Here is what I will describe for day 1. Business as usual, I was up before the sun came up, channeling and singing into what is to come.
My vision is this. A set of agreements to myself that I will,
1) Speak up
2) Say it with heart
3) Invite others to comment as well
4) Conclude that there will be, no conclusion to these never ending tides.
From there, I begin.
Today is not only the first day of my blog, but also the first day I will publish it. No surprise to me, I have no idea how this will be done. I guess I'm about to see.
Thank you to the spirit realm, and guides Saint Francis Assisi for my deep lesson today in the tricks the minds can play when the heart isn't watching.
The heart is not always watching, you see. But it is always aware of something. Today my heart wanted me to play deeper, challenge softer. And speak more. Today is the day I start.
And since I have already begun much before this new website has, there will be a lot to unfold.
For now I leave you with this prayer.
Have heart, dear traveller, that you are the one you need the most. Never regret the past, for it has brought you the present, and will assist in your future. Never deny your short comings, for they may be the path toward your rareness. Your uniqueness is always a gift, no matter how brave you have yet to be.
In Light, yours,
St. Francis Assisi