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  Symbols of light

I am an author to the mystery schools dialect.

2/4/2021

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I haven't received some blasphemous excuse to say something until it's said. Then I have no reason to wish anything except that it's seen. Why do I wish it to be seen even though I don't know why? The mystery schools showed up. In my life. Telling me what is better for me. So I listened. And it was. And now I think I want to share it. Because the mystery schools carry wisdom and never shame. So I wanted more. I love truth. So much. So much that I cry. I cry when I hear this sonnet. I cry when a child is born and can't live and I cry when I feel heartbreak that doesn't go away about it. It never goes away. The heartbreak of what happened to the child, and the feeling of blood curdling truth. All of it. I used to picture the mystery schools as some occult room where death is toiled. But now I see its ancestry and imagery. Pyramids built on top of divine reckless endeavours. As though there was something holding it all up. What holds what up? And who tends to the child who couldn't see their life through? It's us. It's all us. We did all of it. We are the wisdom in the mystery school, and the child lives on somewhere within that. 
As I know these blogs will only get bolder, I want to warn you that this is not the hottest topic I will relate. I'm just working up to more compassion. More love to what's real here. And more saintly humans that walk around, kissing the ground we've been given.
My prayer for more is here. 
I also pray, even more deeply, that the child is free to live.

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Save a little for the break.

2/4/2021

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What break? Did you know that as I start writing these I have no idea what I'm about to say? It's like that in my channeled sessions too. Sometimes a guide will tell me, 'this is going to be soft.' Or 'you're about to rock someones world.' But, rarely ever do I hear it before, or think of it after, unless it was so beautiful that it lingers. It often is, so I'll recollect for another hour and then it's gone. Also, I feel it. Like it's happening through me. That's why I believe it so deeply. That said, I wanted to offer what it is. It sounds like poetry, written specifically for you. And that sounds nice. It also feels like a gentle massage to your aura. As if energy was being removed from all the right places. At the end of the session you'll feel good. And in your life, there will have been a shift, or two, or many. Just depends on you. So each one is tailored to suit. So are the group sessions, which are called classes. The reason they are called that is because they tie in a deep lesson. Maybe one or a few, depends on you. So it's a class, but it's still specific to you. As well, you will have demanded something of it, personally. So you will receive something that I know nothing of. That is the part where I trust. That you received just what you need. And! Yes, there is more, miraculously. And, there's a theatre present. How ever many of your spiritual sides and guides flood the stage to say things through  my channel. But all of this is responded through mere sentences. I think if it were the old ages, I'd be burned at the stake. So for fears sake, I'd say the world is now ready to hear truth in as many ways as possible. Not through the voice of a witch, but through the heart of an ancient practise. Biblical at times, but always poetic.
Here on Earth we have our choices. Some meaningful and some with not so much meaning at all. But I know that each of us are always on an onward path. And who knows what will happen along the way. The one thing I do know, is, I'll see you there. Where ever 'there' is. The path is long, and seems to be wide. We're all on it.
​Walking each other home. 

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Disrupted patterns.

2/4/2021

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For some reason, I woke up today in a rush. At 5 am there is not reason for rush, especially given the fact that I have no commitments until midday. So what is this sense of urgency? I know it well. You might too. It's a deep feeling like something is wrong, and you've forgotten to tend to something. Like, if you look away, it's all going to fall apart.
The mess of it. That feeling. And try as you might, you can never quite find it. Checking all your boxes, it all seems correct. It's because you can't see it. You can only feel it. Something deeply out of order. No use to judge it either, so it just fades over the day and you're distracted enough by the order of things. That seems to make it better. But at the end of the day, lying in bed, if you're awake for it, that feeling will muster again. You know it? I wanted to point it out for a reason. If you tend to it, and listen. If you have the courage to ask the feeling a question, it will indeed speak. It won't be comfortable, I promise you. But the discomfort won't last, and if you just give it it's moment, and let it move through you, without judgement. It might look like a fear, something from the past, but I'll remind you, it's just a story. A removable imprint that wants to urge you toward it. So that you can be free. If you've ever wondered where your spiritual guidance is, you'll be sure to find it within that very feeling. And with commitment, you'll uncover depth, love and spiritual reverence. This is my way through it. Feel free to comment on any revelations you might have had.
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I have arrived, and it's been well worth the wait.

2/3/2021

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Hi friends, allies, triumphant beings of light. Co workers, team mates, dream operators, and all the others whom I have not named. I'm trying to cover all my bases, but there are so many. I like blog posts because you can say something small and it can mean so much. So to conclude I will try. I am going to say a small thing and see how big it can be.
I want to share another part of me, through an introduction to it. It is a short video, where I paint a picture. There is a lesson in the video. The video itself is ten minutes or so. There is script written within its document, and a recorded message to go with it. If you see it, let me know on here, what you think. I want to say this. I want to say these words and boldly.
From mess to magic.

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Today the time has come.

2/3/2021

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When you feel like it's time for something, to happen. Something big. Like the coming of age. Or a big concert, maybe that you are starring in. Something that you've been leading up to. The tide washes out, just before.
And just before the big wave comes in to replace it, you can see nothing a while. It's as though, nothing, has been around me for days. Maybe a month. Come to think of my recent past, I've been very alone in the midst of it all.
I'm coming to see that there is a reason for it, although I don't fully know the total expression of it. I have my psychic abilites, so I have a wind of it. But, the tide has not yet shown back up, so I still wait. Nothing moves. It must be a big wave, I'm thinking. I'm thinking this, also, because my guides, sort of tell me. They tend to my sadness of being alone. They tell me, cherish these days, they won't last forever. And I do try. They are nice. I'm not working a whole lot yet, apart from my new 9-5 of writing constantly, meditating constantly. Operating in a new way, in all parts of my life. I guess I had to let go of some old habits to create new ones. It wasn't easy. I lost a lot of my will.
I think I'm gaining access to something new in it's absence. The will of the divine. It is much bolder than mine, much stronger. Also more loving. I find myself writing poetry. Drawing pictures only from prayers. Loving myself more through the words I speak to others. It is truly sweet. I wouldn't say I miss my old patterns, it's just, when you suddenly do a 180, things move swift. And in order for me to feel comfortable, I wish others to move along with me. However, they don't. Everyone has their tides at different moments of their lives. I'm sure everyone has them just as often just as big and wide. I only wonder, if when my tide finally rolls in, who else will be on it?
Or will I be the only sail in my sea?
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I am alive and well, in the seat of my ancestry.

2/2/2021

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Hello my dear friends and allies, I speak here often, don't I? The truth is I will have managed many posts before their time to be read. The advantage was, for me, I was able to process them. But, soon, the choice will shift and I will be published the moment I click it so. So from here on out, whatever I say will be made manifest. I trust that, you will help me heal, by reading these words. Even more if you comment. Even more, if  you say your truth. Whether comical or in misunderstanding. Because boldness was desired within my shyness. I want to be truly free from it. I don't wish to pick any fights ever. I wish to be bold in truth. 
Who's coming with me?
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The end of the branch.

2/2/2021

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Hello all, it is I, the wanderer of the branch. I am excessing the place where I have just 'gone out on a limb', and guess what! There is nothing quite different at all. Nothing different much when you let go of your 'shoulds'.
Why? Well, frankly I'm still discovering it, but, to say the least, I didn't ever actually start doing what I 'should'.
I only just realized that. From here on in, I'm going to start speaking. That is what I said. That is what came up. I didn't do what I 'should'. I said what I 'should'.
No more. I will not. I will say what I feel instead. So here I go! Good thing I have a blog. 
I also have a payment plan for something more. To tend to my need for value and money for bills overdue, I will ask for your assistance. I will always want to offer something more of myself, and I feel, as though I can offer what I am, in exchange for wealth. I would like to design a program for it. Wealth building. 
I would like to involve others, so they may build wealth too. I would like to yell it from the mountain tops. 
I'm not sure what this payment plan is yet but I think, it might sound, something along these lines.
Would you be willing to pay me, for an interaction to peace within? Would you like to inherit what I have built within myself? This would help me with my life if you said yes. I think that's it, so far.
That sounds like I'm creating myself a job, and I am. But I wanted to say it like that, because I feel its truth. 
I also wanted to offer some way to create money for others. Maybe I can create a job.
Like this. Can I pay someone, to help me with my ongoing duties? Can I ask someone willing to assist me in redirecting my services outward? And who would that person be?
Apply within. Accepting offers as follows.
Please have no resume handy, I won't read it. Please be willing to deal with all the crap I don't want to do. I might pay you measly dollars per hour. How does that sound?
Hm. Maybe I need to learn how to express myself properly. Or, maybe I just need to tend to my own crap.
Something more on that. Why have I not paid myself to tend to my own crap? Not only am I not willing to pay another, I won't even pay myself. I think I'm going to realign my dollar sign, and air it out on here a while.
Feel free to respond with anything resembling the crap, or anything resembling the truth. 
Even if it's confusing.

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In need for more wealth.

2/2/2021

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Truth be told, I am in need of more wealth. By any sense of standard and judgement, I would never actually say that outloud. I would just pretend that everything is fine, and I'm tending to my bills easily. I had been for a long time, so it's a very easy thing to pretend. I kind of, remember what that feels like. It had existed for so long. I think it was the sudden change in the appearance of the world that shifted that, my will to achieve, and also, to want. Money. I just didn't want it. I thought I needed it, but...
Here's something new for me that I never thought I would encounter. How can we dedicate ourselves deeply to our passions while we still have a need for so much wealth? How can you pay all the bills and still have time for fun? 
I surely do not know the answer, but I have discovered, that my need for wealth, is a perception. And my need to create is not. So if I rearrange that, and receive myself as an author, a poet and an illustrator, a tattooer as well who loves each thing as a prayer, then there is my solution. I believe I will be paid what I need in time. I do.
And for the sake of giving, I would also like to be charitable. I would like to see someone paid more for their idea of a creative endeavour. I would also like to create more options for wealth among us. Among the strength of us. It makes me sad to work at a thing when I don't love it. It makes me sad when I see others not liking their work. I know it's possible, but then, who does the odd jobs that no one likes? Well, maybe someone does like those odd jobs, especially when there's value to them.
So there's that thought, but here's this one.
Are we meant to create dynasty and something worth while, or are we meant to trudge through certain things and then enjoy others in our free time?
The deeper thought here, as I process this outloud, on a page for you to read is,  what would happen if we let go of all the things we 'should' do? Would the world fall apart? I do not know the answer once again, but I believe I am about to find out. For me, at least. I just processed the shift of a belief. My next set of beliefs are in the tradition of setting free the 'shoulds'.
So, I wonder what is next. What's the plan here? 
I'm about to go out on a limb here, I can feel it. 
Stay tuned for more.


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A wedding proposal.

2/2/2021

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Well. Today has already been interesting enough to report. I wanted to create something meaningful in my life, that encompassed all my gifts, as well as brought me more love in my life. I am about to give birth to such an idea. 
I'd like to thank my father, who has passed, in 2010, but is very much here with me each and every day. My psychic relationship with him has gotten so strong and deep, I now see his face, his mannerisms in my heart mind space. That's where you see them, passed ancestors, in your heart and your mind simultaneously. It used to be more like a vivid memory, but as my heart softened, I started to become more aware of him. And he speaks often. He has been guiding me toward a better financial plan. I had kinda kicked the bucket with debt recently and he's helped me rebuild it. It just goes to show, how we really need all of us to grow.
Here is the start of the dream. I will also be sending out a newsletter with this proposal (hehe) so please sign up, or email with interest and I'll write you back on the matter.
I'm going to start holding ceremonies for the public, to marry them, to themselves. Hear me out. We are deeply in need of unity and togetherness, and the way toward that is through each of our own hearts. If we can't seem to forgive our past or something within us, our hearts deny access to love from outside us. It is really true, you must love yourself before you are loved in return. And possibly, I would love to marry individuals that would like to see themselves in a healthy relationship, those that want to marry another. As I continue in this field I would love to conduct those ceremonies as well. Imagine, a ceremony, filled with heart and legacy. Filled with all your beautiful inner wisdom, your past creations are blessed and your future alignment is treated with sanctity. I see it going deep, and also fun. We need fun. I'm proposing this here in my blog to introduce it. Please feel free to comment or email, and I will see you, within the pranic field of excellence.

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Deepening the experience.

2/1/2021

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There is a lot to say, I suppose. 
I wanted to also collect what I am, as I process this whirlwind of information that seeks us. Spirit seeks you, so if you reach out to grab it, it will show you everything it is, and with no sense of embarrassment. If you choose to enter a class, it will be much like this; a constant stream of information. Spiritual blog. But it also enhances your frequency and aligns you to that sense of more I spoke about in recent blogs. 
Each enterprise is the same at the root, the truth is ultimately love, but there are endless frequencies to explore within that.
Financial frequencies, observational frequencies, frequencies of more.
Frequencies of motherhood, fatherhood, sisterhood, brotherhood.
You are an excellent source of inner frequency, if you'll just illuminate toward it.
The way I found is through spoken word.
As I decline any adjustments to which words come through me and want to be said, I find that a new possibility occurs, for myself and the journeyer. 
I wanted to share that here, for clarity's sake.
I also wanted to share that, for a first blog, I wonder, if there's any possibility that I had all this wisdom saved up to splash somewhere.
Let this be the place I air it all out, then.
Be well.



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    Opening up to see the light.

    Dear ones, this will have been my first blog post of many. I hope it suits you well to know that, at this time, I am in Kitsilano, Vancouver. I am beginning again. I will be sending out a newsletter often, so if you had signed up for Alana the tattoo artist, know now that it is remaining, but also alongside Alana the channel. 
    I will also say that, for some time, I have been procrastinating my blog till now! So come one come all and feel what I have been privileged to have learned. It is continual as well, so check in often for new content. 
    Here is what I will describe for day 1. Business as usual, I was up before the sun came up, channeling and singing into what is to come. 
    My vision is this. A set of agreements to myself that I will,
    1) Speak up 
    2) Say it with heart
    3) Invite others to comment as well
    4) Conclude that there will be, no conclusion to these never ending tides.
    From there, I begin.
    Today is not only the first day of my blog, but also the first day I will publish it. No surprise to me, I have no idea how this will be done. I guess I'm about to see.
    Thank you to the spirit realm, and guides Saint Francis Assisi for my deep lesson today in the tricks the minds can play when the heart isn't watching. 
    The heart is not always watching, you see. But it is always aware of something. Today my heart wanted me to play deeper, challenge softer. And speak more. Today is the day I start. 
    And since I have already begun much before this new website has, there will be a lot to unfold.
    For now I leave you with this prayer.

    Have heart, dear traveller, that you are the one you need the most. Never regret the past, for it has brought you the present, and will assist in your future. Never deny your short comings, for they may be the path toward your rareness. Your uniqueness is always a gift, no matter how brave you have yet to be.
    In Light, yours,
    St. Francis Assisi

alanacronshaw@gmail.com
​

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